This is my 100th article I’ve written on lifestyle topics for Jina Life and I have been inspired by the Youth Leadership Program I’m currently running at Kadinia International College through Toastmasters International as this week’s focus was listening skills. The importance of showing respect, paying attention and being a good audience when someone else is speaking.

But in this article I’m going to take it deeper to discuss who you should listen to when seeking advice on challenging life decisions.

I quote Ralph Waldo Emerson…

“Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.”

So how do you know who you should listen to and who are your biggest critics?

The reason why there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong is because everyone has their own opinion and perception of your situation. You must realise they are fully entitled to their own opinion but remember they are looking at your situation from where they stand. Now this can often be extremely beneficial gaining advice from someone looking from the outside in. However these perceptions can also sometimes be biased depending on who you’re listening to. Perhaps advice simply on what they would do if they were you, or advice for you that keeps them happy. You may want to believe that everyone you ask for advice has your best interests at heart but don’t be mistaken and also realise at the end of the day – they are not you.

When it comes down to it you must make your own decisions in life and you are the one that has to live with them. Gaining outside advice can be paramount in helping you live your best life especially when it’s in an area you don’t have professional skills in or would just like to save yourself from making mistakes you see others do.

Keep in mind some people just can’t see or share your vision until you’ve created it for them to physically see. Others can help you see your path more clearly faster. Some can see your mistakes before you make them.

Think back to your past, who have you listened to, followed their advice and it turned out well? Then who in the past have you allowed yourself to listen to, made you feel better at the time but it worked out badly or you live with regrets from following that advice?

Bad advice for you generally goes against your inner instinct. When you’re faced with a decision and are struggling to make it, it can often mean your darkness or fear is tempting you to take the wrong path as opposed to the right path for you.

Ultimately you want to establish who no matter what, will tell you the truth and what you NEED to hear not always what you WANT to hear when you become challenged with a decision to make.

The reason you want to establish this early is because when you find yourself faced with a tough decision you want to be sure if seeking advice you will go straight to the person you know and trust, who understands you and shares your values and vision and not to those who don’t, yet you may be drawn to. The wrong people are those who will help you justify your decision over making the right decision for you.

For more information
Contact : Jacqueline Pigdon
Tel No   : +61 (0) 404 362 379
Email    : jacqueline@jinalife.com

Do you have work/life balance? This is a very common question now especially amongst executives and if you are one of them you might like to take some time to look a little more closely at your life to answer this. One often relates work/life balance to the amount of hours you spend at each but what I’d like to focus on here is how ‘effort balance’ is important to your work/life balance. Do you apply the same amount of dedication and thus effort to all of the other areas of your life like you apply to your work if you’re a hard dedicated and long hour’s worker? Often work and careers are shown a lot of dedication because so many people see you at work, you ‘have’ to go to work and not many people see what you do in other areas of your life. Are you often measured there! And due to these factors your efforts can very quickly and easily become out of work/life balance.

Sometimes you may want to and need to sacrifice time at home for time at work, time with your partner, family, children, friends, health, holidays etc. But what are you like when you get there? Do you dedicate the same amount of effort and energy into the other areas of your life once you get there such as when you’re with your partner, exercising, children, family, friends, health, holidays? If you answer no to at least one of these then you might want to start setting some goals in this/these areas for effort. For without 100% effort there is not 100% attainment and therefore you are not reaching your potential in that area, are neglecting that area and therefore simply out of work/life and effort balance.

Working on your work life balance is just as important as a business owner working on their business not only in their business. It’s easy to live our lives and forgot to work on our lives and where we want to go. Work/life balance requires planning, control, effort and sticking to your plan without ‘allowing’ another area of your life to get in its way!

Without work life balance and 100% equal effort in all areas of your life you can feel out of control and balancing requires control… Just as much as too much of one thing is bad, not enough of some things are when things are going to give. Life can be like a juggling act!! Managing all these things can become overwhelming and sometimes make you feel like it’s just too much and anxiety and stress hit you head on! If this sounds familiar here are 7 steps to help you gain more work/life balance in your life:

• Group together the different areas in your life such as work, family, relationship, hobbies, health & fitness, personal time etc.
• Next to each area write down how much effort you apply to each on a scale of 0% -100% and if not 100% write one point that would make this % increase.
• Write down the number of hours you spend each week on that area.
• See if your life looks in balance to you.
• If not, decide on areas that you can reduce time and give to something else and point out those that you are simply being lazy in and could provide more effort.
• Commit to the points that would increase your effort that you wrote down in point 2
• Then assess your results, if you’re applying 100% effort in all areas of your life and everything looks in balance then well done! If not, focus on applying more effort to the areas lacking in the next month and watch the results, your satisfaction and enthusiasm grow!

For more information
Contact : Jacqueline Pigdon
Tel No   : +61 (0) 404 362 379
Email    : jacqueline@jinalife.com